My Weird Habit: You Won’t Believe I Do This!
We all have quirks that make us unique—those little habits that we don’t exactly advertise at parties. Some people chew on pen caps, others talk to their plants, and a few binge-watch the same TV show a hundred times. Me? Well, my weird habit takes things to a whole new level, and every time I admit it, people tilt their heads, squint their eyes, and say, “Wait…you actually do that?”
Here it is: I talk to inanimate objects. Not just a passing word here or there—I hold full-on conversations. My coffee maker has heard more of my morning rants than any therapist. When it gurgles and hisses while brewing, I nod like it’s answering me back. “Yes, I know I should’ve gone to bed earlier, but here we are,” I’ll mumble while pouring the first cup.
It doesn’t stop there. My vacuum? Oh, it’s practically my sidekick. I apologize to it every time I run over a sock. My car? She gets pep talks before every road trip. “C’mon, girl, we got this. Just 200 miles to go and I promise I’ll spring for premium gas next time.” Sometimes I even pat the steering wheel for encouragement like it’s alive.
The weirdest part is, I don’t even realize I’m doing it until someone else catches me. One time, a friend stayed over and walked in on me sternly negotiating with my microwave. Apparently, I had been saying, “Don’t you dare beep at me yet, I’m not ready!” while staring at my leftovers spinning around. The look on her face said it all: equal parts confusion, amusement, and mild concern.
But honestly, it’s comforting. My little habit makes the world feel less lonely, and in a way, it adds character to my day. A silent house suddenly feels lively when I can sass back at the toaster or congratulate the washing machine for surviving another heavy load. It might be unusual, but it’s oddly grounding.
Here’s the kicker: sometimes the objects “answer back” in their own way. The coffee maker sputters, the car creaks, the microwave dings right after I say something dramatic. I can’t help but laugh—like the universe is in on the joke.
Sure, I know it’s a bit quirky. People might think I’ve lost my marbles, but I’ve learned to embrace it. My weird habit isn’t hurting anyone, and it makes mundane chores more entertaining. Honestly, I think we could all benefit from treating life a little less seriously and leaning into our quirks.
So yes, I admit it: I talk to my stuff. Judge me if you must, but at least my coffee maker always listens.
