From Farm Chores to LOLs: A Comedian’s Hilarious Morning
Some people start their day with yoga, green juice, and quiet meditation. I start mine with a donkey braying like it’s auditioning for America’s Got Talent and a chicken giving me side-eye because I dared to sleep past sunrise. Welcome to my farm life—where chores collide with comedy, and every morning turns into its own unscripted stand-up routine.
The alarm clock is optional around here because Henry the donkey has mastered the art of wake-up calls. At precisely 6:03 a.m., he lets out a sound that can only be described as half foghorn, half horror movie soundtrack. Forget a snooze button—there’s no silencing a donkey determined to remind you that breakfast is late.
Stumbling out in my robe (yes, the same one I film in, don’t judge), I make my way to the chicken coop. That’s where the first punchline of the morning usually lands. Chickens, I’ve discovered, are professional hecklers. They cluck, squawk, and flap around like a live studio audience that’s never satisfied. You think you’re delivering food, but they’re judging your timing, your outfit, and your choice of footwear.
Next up: goat duty. Now, goats don’t just eat hay. Oh no, they eat drama for breakfast. Mine are like toddlers on espresso—jumping, bleating, climbing on anything that doesn’t move fast enough. Try carrying a bucket of grain without spilling it, and you’ll understand why slapstick comedy was invented. Picture me sliding through mud, a goat hanging off my sleeve, and another trying to stick its entire face in the bucket. That’s not a chore—that’s a three-act play.
Of course, no morning is complete without a turkey cameo. My turkey struts around like a security guard who takes his job way too seriously. He blocks doors, chases shadows, and gobbles at me like he’s filing a complaint with HR. The punchline? I always lose the argument. Every. Single. Time.
By the time I get through the barnyard circuit, I’ve already collected a full set of material for the day. The animals don’t just give me chores—they hand me jokes on a silver platter. Who needs a comedy writer when you have a goat that steals your hat mid-sentence or a donkey that perfectly times its bray during your TikTok rant?
The best part? Turning all that chaos into laughs online. What looks like a disaster in the moment becomes the highlight reel of the day once I share it. And judging by the comments, I’m not the only one who thinks “feeding chickens while half-asleep in slippers” should be its own sitcom.
So while some people sip their morning coffee in peace, I sip mine while dodging feathers and negotiating with livestock. It’s messy, it’s loud, and it’s ridiculous—but it’s also hilarious. And if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that the best way to start the day isn’t with perfection. It’s with laughter.
Because on this farm, every sunrise brings new chores, new chaos, and new LOLs—and honestly, I wouldn’t have it any other way.
